Bristol woman supports new St Peter's Hospice campaign '44 Days' in memory of husband
Bristol woman Tacey Bain knows how precious the final days of a loved one’s life can be.
Her husband David spent the last two weeks of his life at St Peter's Hospice, where specialist staff cared for him after a sudden cancer diagnosis. Now Tacey is sharing her family’s story to support the Hospice’s new ‘44 Days’ fundraising campaign.
The campaign highlights the average amount of time a patient spends under the charity’s care and asks people to reflect on an important question: what would you do with 44 days left?
For Tacey, those final days together were made immeasurably easier because of the Hospice.
“David was a lovely man,” she said. “He was a very good family man – he regarded his greatest achievement as our three children and was enormously proud of them. He worked as a family law solicitor, supporting people during some of the hardest moments in their lives, which made him appreciate all the things that were good in life.
“He loved sport. At the age of 71 he was still playing hockey at Masters’ level. His team won the European Spirit of Masters Gold Cup in Valencia a year before he died.”
Cycling was another of David’s great passions. He completed Land’s End to John O’Groats with a friend and regularly took part in charity rides, including the St Peter’s Hospice Tour de Bristol.
In 2024 the couple walked the Camino de Santiago, but towards the end of the trip David began suffering from stomach pain. At first, they assumed it was caused by something he had eaten but by the time they returned home, the pain had worsened significantly. After several hospital visits and scans, the couple received devastating news.
“Just one month after coming home David was diagnosed with cancer and we were told there were no treatment options available,” said Tacey.
When David’s pain became too difficult to manage at home, he was referred to St Peter’s Hospice directly from hospital.
“The diagnosis was entirely unforeseen and a big shock to us all, especially as David kept so fit and healthy,” she said. “It was a very overwhelming time but being at the Hospice felt completely different.
“When David arrived he was extremely uncomfortable and unable even to use his phone. But the Hospice let him relax and managed his pain,” Tacey explained. “Everything ran so smoothly once we were there. They know what they’re doing and they’re good at it. There was no moving between beds and wards, we could really settle.
“We found great comfort in the calm environment and the time it gave us together. The room was hotel standard and the food was brilliant. Even though it was hard for David to eat we felt nourished by the generosity. The whole set up made things we might usually take for granted, like being together and holding hands, far easier.”
For Tacey, one of the most important aspects of hospice care was the privacy it allowed.
“What really struck us was the sense of privacy. You can close the door, and even the curtains if you like, and create a private space. Because of the pace of David’s illness there was a feeling of ‘what do I need to say before it’s too late’.
“Our nine-month-old granddaughter was made to feel welcome, which in turn made it much easier for our daughter to visit.
“All three of our daughters’ partners were able to go into the room one at a time and reassure David that they would take care of them. This was incredibly important for David. And because of the Hospice, he was comfortable enough to hear it.”
David spent his final days at St Peter’s Hospice, just 100 metres from his childhood home, and died peacefully on 6 June 2024, less than two months after returning from holiday.
This sense of giving quality time to patients at their end-of-life, is central to the new 44 Days campaign the Hospice is running to raise vital funds.
Their aim is to fill those precious days with love and light, taking on the paperwork, the medication and the practical aspects of care, so that families can simply enjoy being together.
The 44 Days campaign also holds a special significance for Tacey and her family.
She said: “Forty-four was David’s lucky number. It was the number on his school locker, he used it when he raced Clubman’s cars in his 40s and it was in his email address.
“We feel so lucky that he was referred to the Hospice and would encourage everyone to donate to this amazing campaign. Even now the Hospice are supporting me through bereavement support, it is such a vital community resource.”
Through the campaign, St Peter’s Hospice hopes to raise vital funds to ensure every patient’s final days are filled with comfort, dignity and compassionate care.
For more information and to support visit 44 Days - St Peter's Hospice
